FEAR - False Evidence Appearing Real

Remember in my previous post, I mentioned about attending this Entrepreneur's Action Program Boot Camp? Well, there was one thing I learnt and probably remember forever is how they broke down our fear. What do we fear? Apparently fear itself.

They told us at the Boot Camp that FEAR is really false evidence appearing real. And this has stopped many people from doing a lot of things. When we were kids, our parents have instilled this fear in us that if we didn't study, we will end up like the poor man(or woman) who has his cardboard home underneath the bridge. When we were in school, our teachers instilled fear in us by ridiculing us when we got the answers wrong and our schoolmates laugh at us.

When we are adults, there are a lot of things we want to try but because FEAR has been ingrained in us, we hold back. A lot of times we play mind games with ourselves. One part tells us to go for it, the other part warns us about the negative possible outcome.

Have you lived to regret not taking action sometimes to go for what you wanted. One good example is that during seminars and events, normally, the presenter would ask for someone to volunteer to answer a question or do something up on stage. A lot of times, the question will turn out to be either ridiculous simple or the action is just going up there and doing so equally simple act. But because of our fear of being laughed at, we have always held back. I *raises hand* have always had that fear. But after that Boot Camp, I have learnt that FEAR is really at the end of the day, just false evidence appearing real.. and the best remedy for it is to take action. The EAP Boot Camp has really done wonders. I would definitely recommend people to have a look at their program. They have free previews every now and then, and it is totally without obligations. If you do go, please give Wendy Lai and Tammie Lum my regards. These girls are really very nice people :D.

Oh, found an interesting website here on Making Money. Have a great weekend everybody.

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Be Alert and Cautious - Burundanga

I know that sometimes we mean well when we send out alerts and warning messages to our family and friends. In fact, this morning alone, I received a few emails with the same message, which read "Be Alert and Cautious when you are given a name card by a total stranger on the street". The email message continued to tell a story of how a lady who was handed a name card by this stranger at a petrol station, offering his services as a painter and as the woman was being polite, just took the card with her and left in her car after she has finished filling in the petrol. The story went on to say that the lady started feeling dizzy and the source of it came from some ordour that was coming from the hand which held the business card. Apparently, there was a drug wiped over the business card and the drug is called Burundanga".

In the past, when I received such type of mails, my first reaction was to forward it out to my family and my friends immediately. But having been told by some of these friends that the mails which I sent out are not true, these days, I do try to do a little checking first.

My checks on this claim has revealed several things.

1) Definition: Burundanga is a drug made from the plant called either cacao sabanero or borrachero. It is used to drug unsuspecting tourists in order to rob them. This was taken from About.com - South America Travel

2) From a medical source: Scopolamine can be used as a pre-surgical drug for the purpose of impairing memory of surgical trauma. It provides an initial knockout effect, before the anesthesia proper is administered, and has the added benefit of preventing long term memory formation during the period of time. At one time scopolamine was given to women during childbirth. This was taken from earthops. There was an excerpt from the Wall Street Journal Article dated July3, 1995 which tells of how people in Columbia have been drugged and have lost their precious belongings and money to unscrupulous people using that drug. The article is here.

3) From snopes.com, the claim that criminals used Burundanga-soaked business cards to incapacitate victims is FALSE. They have an example of the similar emails which I received except the mail which I received, the woman has no name, the place where it apparently occurred was also not identified. One of the mails which I received read like this....

Must Read and Please be careful out there. A man came over and offeredhis services as a painter to a female putting gas in her car and left his card. She said no ,but accepted his card out of kindness and got in the car.The man then got into a car driven by another gentleman. As the lady left the service station, she saw the men following her out of the station at the same time. Almost immediately, she started to feel dizzy and could not catch her breath. She tried to open the window and realized that the odor was on her hand; the same hand which accepted the card from the gentleman at the gas station. She then noticed the men wereimmediately behind her and she felt she needed to do something at that moment. She drove into the first driveway and began to honk her horn repeatedly to ask for help.The men drove away but the lady still felt pretty bad for severalminutes after she could finally catch her breath. Apparently,there was a substance on the card that could have seriously injured her. This drug is called 'BURUNDANGA'and it is used by people who wish to incapacitate a victim in orderto steal from or take advantage of them. This drug is four times more dangerous than the date rape drug and is transferable on simple cards. So take heed and make sureyou don't accept cards at any given time alone or from someone on the streets. This applies to those making house calls and slipping you a card when they offer their services . PLEASE SEND THIS E-MAILALERT TO EVERY FEMALE YOU KNOW

I suppose we just have to remember, however much we want to save our family and friends from danger, we should do a little bit of checking first before we scare them silly. What do you think?

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How to save petrol, thus saving money

Like every good citizen of Malaysia, I am still reeling from the shock of such a drastic increase in the price of petrol as of midnight yesterday. Every other blogger has a post up on this issue and why should I be different. At the same time, I was also frantically googling for suggestions on how to save petrol, thus saving a little of my hard earned money.

There were several sites which I visited that gave pretty good suggestions like keeping your tyres inflated, not speeding and braking too often as this will cause more petrol be to consumed, not leaving the engine running (and the air conditioning too) whilst waiting. But there was one particular website which managed to put a smile on my face despite such a gloomy scenario.



This post was published by a person call Mike at blogiseverything. Mike suggested 6 ways to save petrol (which I think was rather tongue-in-cheek as some of these suggestions may save some fuel - which he even gave the percentage possibility of fuel saved - but may lead you to more expenditure, in the event you have an accident or you need to fix your car later.



These were his suggestions in brief and to have a more detailed description of his idea, do visit his website.

1) Properly Inflated Tyres (Average savings: 3%. That reminds me, better get my tyres checked.. i think they are kinda of deflated and balding too)

2) Tailgating NASCAR style (Average savings: 16%. This one, you had better work out the cost of fixing your front bumper, radiator and anything else that is busted, plus the fella's car in front too)

3) The Brick Trick (Average savings: 21%. Now this one, I really have to think about it)

4) Forward Momentum (Average savings: 33% to 42%, depending on wind direction. Haha.. this makes me think of sailing)

5) Gravity's Rainbow (Average savings: 54% plus. Hard for me as I live on flat ground. Not going anywhere too far too soon if I took up his suggestion)

6) Cut their throats (Average savings: Nil but supposed to make you feel better. But you have to replace US Govt with Malaysian Govt)

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Sharon Stone's Opps

There are times when I envy all those popular people in the news. The attention they get and sometimes the adulations. But this is one time when I am glad that I am just a nobody.

A couple of days ago, Sharon Stone, the popular actor made a remark that apparently angered millions of Chinese people in China when she let it slip in a TV interview (YouTube) that China's recent earthquake may have been "bad karma" for the country's actions against Tibet. I picked up the article in yesterday's daily.



I believe that thought would have not been very far from most people's minds when the disaster struck in China. I supposed that many of us would have said the same thing over breakfasts, lunches and dinners. But then, we are nobodies.

The same thoughts would have probably crossed some people's mind when Cyclone Nargis literally destroyed Yangon. This would have been brought about by the Junta's bad karma?

Yeah, there would be others who cannot stomach this utterly cruel and unfeeling way of thinking, that retribution should be placed on the innocents, especially the children but when catastrophes like earthquakes, tsunamis, cyclones happens, it sweeps across an area without stopping to segregate the innocents from rest of the lot.

The Daily Dish today reported that Stone's Dior campaign has been axed in China. Apparently Stone has already issued out a statement to apologize for her remarks but quote "But the damage has been done--China's official Xinhua News Agency said Thursday that Stone was the "public enemy of all mankind," while myriad blogs have labeled the actress with epithets like "heart of Stone". This was picked up from Forbes.com this morning and the photo on the right is from AP Photo/Noah Berger.

When I read this, I remembered this Malay saying "Siapa yang makan cili, dia yang rasa pedas" (literally translated to mean 'He would eats chillies, will feel the hotness/spiciness'). My 2 sen worth is, being Chinese, most of us do believe in karma, retribution, payback (boh ying - Cantonese). Do I hear the sound of a hammer hitting the nail on the head with Stone's remark? mmmm....

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Not all Carbs are created equal

I have been following dcyk's progress on his weight loss program and I reckon that he is rather successful. I also reckon that what he is doing is great coz he is on this emergency weight loss program to look very "leng chai" (handsome) during his big wedding day but I would not think that one should go off carbs for ever as it definitely goes against what we've been taught in school about having a balanced diet to keep us well and healthy.


I have been doing a little research of my own on Glycemic Index (GI). Apparently not all carbohydrate foods are created equal and the GI is the ranking of carbohydrates according to how they affect our blood glucose and thus our weight gain.

It seems that choosing low GI carbs - the ones that produce only small fluctuations in our blood glucose and insulin levels - is the secret to long-term health reducing our risk of heart disease and diabetes and is the key to sustainable weight loss.

The following has been extracted from The Glycemic Index site.

What are the Benefits of the Glycemic Index?

Eating a lot of high GI foods can be detrimental to your health because it pushes your body to extremes. This is especially true if you are overweight and sedentary. Switching to eating mainly low GI carbs that slowly trickle glucose into your blood stream keeps your energy levels balanced and means you will feel fuller for longer between meals.

# Low GI diets help people lose and control weight
# Low GI diets increase the body's sensitivity to insulin
# Low GI carbs improve diabetes control
# Low GI carbs reduce the risk of heart disease
# Low GI carbs reduce blood cholesterol levels
# Low GI carbs can help you manage the symptoms of PCOS
# Low GI carbs reduce hunger and keep you fuller for longer
# Low GI carbs prolong physical endurance
# High GI carbs help re-fuel carbohydrate stores after exercise

How to Switch to a Low GI Diet

The basic technique for eating the low GI way is simply a "this for that" approach - ie, swapping high GI carbs for low GI carbs. You don't need to count numbers or do any sort of mental arithmetic to make sure you are eating a healthy, low GI diet.

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# Use breakfast cereals based on oats, barley and bran
# Use breads with wholegrains, stone-ground flour, sour dough
# Reduce the amount of potatoes you eat
# Enjoy all other types of fruit and vegetables
# Use Basmati or Doongara rice
# Enjoy pasta, noodles, quinoa
# Eat plenty of salad vegetables with a vinaigrette dressing

This is a list of GI Values of some of the more common foods that I got from a fitness instructor but for a specific GI search, this is quite a useful site, The Glycemic Index.

GI of Breakfast Cereals
Kellogg's Cornflakes 84
Kellogg's Rice Krispies 82
Kellong's Special K 54
Oatmeal 49
Quaker Puffed Wheat 67

GI of Grains
Basmati Rice 58
Brown Rice 55
Long Grain White Rice 56
Short Grain White Rice 72
Noodles (Instant) 46

GI of Fruit
Apple 38
Banana 55
Cantaloupe 65
Cherries 22
Grapefruit 25
Grapes 46
Kiwi 52
Mango 55
Orange 44
Papaya 58
Pear 38
Pineapple 66
Plum 39
Watermelon 103

GI of Vegetables
Beets 69
Broccoli 10
Cabbage 10
Carrots 49
Corn 55
Green Peas 48
Lettuce 10
Mushrooms 10
Onions 10
Parsnips 97
Potato (baked)93
Potato (mashed, instant) 86
Potato (new) 62
Potato (french fries) 75
Red Peppers 10
Sweet Potato 54

GI of Legumes/Beans
Baked Beans 48
Broad Beans 79
Chickpeas 33
Navy Beans 38
Pinto Beans 39
Red Kidney Beans 27
Soy Beans 18
White Beans 31

GI of Breads, Muffins and Cakes
Blueberry Muffin 59
Doughnut 76
Pita Bread 57
Sponge Cake 46
Waffles 76
White Bread 70
Whole Wheat Bread 69

GI of Pasta
Spaghetti 43
Ravoli (Meat) 39
Linguine 46
Macaroni 47
Rice Vermicelli 58

GI of Dairy Foods
Milk (Whole) 22
Milk (Skimmed) 32
Mikl (Chocolate flavoured) 34
Ice Cream (whole) 61
Ice Cream (low fat) 50
Yogurt (low fat) 33

GI of Snack Foods
Cashews 22
Chocolate Bar 49
Corn Chips 72
Jelly Beans 80
Peanuts 14
Popcorn 55
Potato Chips 55
Pretzels 83
Snickers Bar 41
Walnuts 15

GI of Cookies and Crackers
Crackers 74
Crispbread 71
Melba Toast 70
Oatmeal Cookies 55
Rice Cakes 82
Rice Crackers 91
Soda Crackers 74
Water Crackers 78

GI of Sugars
Fructose 23
Glucose 100
Honey 58
Lactose 46
Maltose 105
Sucrose 65

Notes on GI of Foods
- Reference Food is glucose (GI100)
- Glycemic values may vary, hence the above values are approximate
- Foods that score higher than 70 on the GI are considered high GI foods
- We cannot avoid all high GI foods in our diet, but at least we are aware of what they are and we are able to make better choices on the food we eat.

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The Underdog... in the Looks Department!

Does being pretty or handsome give one a headstart in life? Or better opportunities. During the last couple of weeks, everybody (those who were interested lah.. coz i know many who don't give 2 hoots, really) was guessing which of our two gentlemen was going up to space, Dr Faiz Khaleed (the younger one) or Dr. Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor (the cuter one?)? Of coz, the radio DJs of my fav radio channel were requesting people to send in their sms-es or to call in to vote.




It was not surprising that most voted for the "cute" and "handsome" one, Dr. Sheikh. I had to put the words cute and handsome in parentheses as beauty is really in the eyes of the beholder. Those who called up to vote for Dr Faiz actually spoilt it by saying that they were voting for the "underdog". Hey... what makes Dr Faiz the underdog? I am sure it is not about qualifications. Perhaps it is about looks?

I was not really surprised when they announced it in the papers today as to which gentleman was selected to go into space. So, perhaps looks did help. But it could be Age before Beauty also coz Dr Sheikh is 35yrs old whilst Dr Faiz is only 27yrs old :).

One of my ex-bosses ZI is rather good looking and he played it to his advantage. Many a time, he would get away with almost anything, using his looks and his charming smile. He often remarked "Hey..it is not easy to be handsome you know!!" Ya.. tell us about it.

No wonder cosmetic companies do so well as everyone is wanting to look pretty and the blokes are also doing it too. Guess it does not hurt, does it....except for the wallet as the price of being beautiful doesn't come cheap.

What the BUT !!

I was reading this morning's papers and whilst reading the article on the merger of the Barisan Nasional coalition parties into one, I suddenly remembered my friend MK. He used to tell us, "Don't give me that crap. I want an honest answer. Anything you say before the word "BUT" is nothing but a lie. What you meant to say is after the word "BUT"".

Haha.. ya. Come to think of it. When people ask you "Would you like to join me for dinner?". Normally, if you had wanted to, you would have said "Sure" or "Yeah" or even "When". But when the answer goes something like "I'd like to BUT..." or Yes BUT...". After the "BUT" word, it will be "I have another dinner appointment" or some other excuse.


"Do you think I am fat?" .... "Na..of coz not BUT you would look better if you wore clothes with vertical lines"

"Do you think I have buck teeth?"...."No lah..what makes you think that...BUT you will not have problems when you floss, do you?"


MK must have been a genius to realize that BUT the rest of us are not Morons either ..haha.

So, when our Prime Minister was asked if he felt that there is a need for a merger of the Barisan Nasional coalition parties into one, his answer was " I am not saying that this (merger proposal) is impossible BUT perhaps sometime in the future...BUT for now, I have yet to see its advantages, especially on its practical side".

My commments ... "I think the merger will happen.. BUT not in the foreseeable near future".

Reveal them.. these fiends, evil beasts!

Of late, there have been so many reports of sex fiends and their heinous crimes in the papers. They are like dirt surfacing up on water surface. Everyday, there will be at least one article on this sort of crime in the papers.

I remember reading a couple of days ago that members of the public are against the disclosure of the names of pedophiles for fear of the family members being ostracized and shunned. I am of the opinion that this depends on the severity of the situation. In most cases if the only harm that the pedophile has done is to surf child porn in the internet, these can be forgiven and given treatment. However, like the one in little Nurin’s case or the latest one in today’s papers about the medium who had been preying on a 10 year old and her brother a 13 year old, I simply cannot agree that we just read it and hope that somebody catches this guy.

Taking the law into our own hands? I don't think so. I would like to think that every extra pair of eyes and hand helps. My friend and I were reading the an English daily today about the case. Yes, we know that the police and the various investigative teams are doing the best that they can. In this sea of 28 million over people and many tucked away places, one can stay hidden for a long time, if one tried hard enough. So, can we help? It would help a heap if we had photos. A great written description of the culprit is as helpful as identifying whose heap of crap it is.

What I don’t understand is when I continued reading the English daily that it was mentioned that the Chinese Dailies like China Press and Sin Chew covered this story with publishing the photographs of the fiend when I cannot even find one little photo in the English Daily. Is it because it was considered bad taste? That it was protecting the little 10 year old girl and 13 year old boy. Oh please. Think about the possibility of this evil beast doing the same to other children in future. Isn"t it better to have him caught and jail as soon as possible?

My friend and I tried to go into Sin Chew’s website but being truly banana people, we both stared at the screen and it just stared back at us. We were not able to decipher anything from the site. Sought the help of our office tea lady who so happened to have yesterday’s copy of Sin Chew to help us locate the piece that we needed. My friend suggested that I took the photos and posted it, so that we all know how the beast looks like and perhaps by the circulation of these photos, he can be put behind bars the soonest possible.

Tell the Truth Please!

Pictures don't lie.

I have been trying to search for latest updates on the situation in Myanmar but most of the news were at least 2 days old. It seems that very little news have managed to make their way out of Myanmar to the rest of the world.

However, I chanced upon a site where a Burmese news blog MoeMaKa Media reported on this video footage of Singapore's Straits Times interviewing some Myanmar citizens and others traveling between Yangon and Singapore.

The video footage shows a Myanmar citizen welcoming his family's arrival in Singapore and proclaiming their happiness at being in a stable Singapore, and then shows another Myanmar national exclaiming that even though there are curfews set, they were doing OK and things weren't that bad. “Overall quite ok lah,” claimed one man. “Oh, yeah, everything is fine… The airport, the security and erm, things are functioning fine.. all normal,” said one man who appears to be an airline pilot (not a Myanmar national).

I find that very hard to believe. Going back to my trusted website, that is where I found these horrible photos. Yes, they are in bad taste and offensive but I believe that sometimes we have to be shocked into realization to the truth of the matter.

Monks has been killed like this in Burma by Junta






Another Death list (update from AAPP)

Name: Ven, Thila Sara
Address: Yuzana monastery, Myintkyina, Kachin State
Age:
Date of death: 26 September 2007

Name: Ven, Thila Sara
Address: Yuzana monastery, Myintkyina, Kachin State
Age:
Date of death: 26 September 2007

Name: Tun Tun Lin
Address: 1060. 13 street, 7 ward, S/Oakkalapa, Rangoon
Age: 31
Date of death: 27 September 2007

What do you think? Do you really believe that all is well and rosy in Myanmar?

Is it safe to FLIRT?

Was browsing the Yahoo Answers thingy over lunch and came across a question that has been long beaten to death… “Is it really wrong to flirt if you are committed to someone?” Of coz the answers were all for and against and with lots more sitting on the fence.

So, would you? If you are already committed to someone?

What is flirting anyways? Bring out the dicky… ahem.. dictionary..

Flirting is defined as
1. To make playfully romantic or sexual overtures.
2. To deal playfully, triflingly, or superficially with: flirt with danger.
3. To move abruptly or jerkily.


Lets for the time being forget definitions 2 and 3 yeah. So, that leaves us with playfully romantic or sexual overtures. Geez.. a bit tricky there... coz everything is relative. It’s like how playful is playful.. a kitten is playful. Romantic or sexual? Some would argue that sexual will have to be showing lots of skin or touching no-no places. And being committed to someone… if just hanging out.. is not as committed as living in…which is still ok until you get everything on paper.. signed and sealed and sworn upon.. make any difference?

I think it is really one big bomb ticking there if you want to play the flirting game unless you are so totally single and un-committed to anyone. Even if they were to have designed a flirt meter to wear around your neck, doing the settings or configurations will take days and at the end of it, you are still without a so call safe flirt limit. The range will be still “totally harmless” to “you are so dead when we get home dear”.



I think flirting is really inevitable. It is human nature and some do it more flamboyantly than others. My verdict is “ Yeah.. sure.. flirting is a-OK but just don’t hurt anyone when you are doing it… especially yourself!

G-strings for Men

For the past week or so, I’ve been having breakfast to the sounds of the morning Radio show which was promoting Sloggi’s G-string, I reckon for both women and men. I am familiar with their range of Gs for the women folk but this was the first time I have heard that they were promoting for the guys too.



So, out of curiosity (a friend said that I was just being a pervert), on my usual Saturday lepaking sprees, I went to check out at the shops and counters to see how popular Gs were with guys. Surprisingly or (was it not?), not many of them carry them and some of the salesgirls when “Meh leh keh?” – translated “Whatzat”. These counters were at the normal departmental stores, not the specialty shops.

During dinner with some friends on Sunday, I brought out the topic of Gs just to find out what my friends thought about Gs and wearing them. The girls were ok but guys were a no dice. This of course was not a great sample coz all the guys in this group were married. Maybe if there were singles in the group, I would have gotten more interesting inputs.

One of the girls, kinda of a miss know-it-all highlighted to us that we must first know that there is a difference between a thong and a G… ok ok.. a lot of difference a narrow strip of fabric and a piece of string between the butt cheeks make.. but she was insistent. So, we gave in to her even though we all know where that piece of fabric or string will end up in less than a few minutes of putting the thing on.

The comments that went around were sooooo funnee of which I am not sure if I could even repeat them all here.. coz already my blog has been rated PG.

We did agree that most of the time, people wear it to feel sexy and probably to look sexy. I have seen girls who purposely wear very low cut jeans over their Gs, probably to tease. It would have been a real nasty sight if it was their granny panties peaking out of their jeans or pants yeah? But would that work for a guy? I saw this guy at the office once with his work shirt tucked inside his Y fronts and I could see the word “Renoma” peeking out. Well, a mite difficult to tuck one’s shirt into a G??

One of the guys said that his nuts would be hanging out the whole day and he’ll probably have nuts burn before the end of the day. Another said that he’ll not be to cool about the cool ventilation.

The girls asked if the guys will wear it just to please their wives.. or as a surprise to their wives. All were of the same thoughts…. Either their wives will be very worried that they are suddenly starting to cross-dress or it will make their wives bring up yesterday’s dinner (baarffff).

My opinion is … whatever that floats your boat dude coz you are the one wearing it and if you can walk around the whole day with a sting up your crack and you nuts swinging like pendulums…have a happy day

Can you be friends after a breakup?

I was browsing through one of those girl magazines last nite and saw this line in one of the articles… can you be friends after a breakup. Is it possible because you are both matured people or are the wounds too deep?

Well, I suppose there are those of us who are able to part as friends after the end of a relationship. I know of this cool couple who remained great friends after their divorce. They still attend family gatherings, friends’ birthdays or weddings together. They may not arrive there together but there were obviously no awkward moments for these two.

In my case I have a very strange situation. It was not even a breakup or near a breakup. There was this guy colleague, whom I will call C. During the time he was with my company, he has being one of my squash kaki (mate) and golf mate. He has even gone on various trips with me and my colleagues. However, the strangest thing happened. After a few years with the company, he left for another company.

I did keep in contact for the first year or so. Subsequently, there was very little communication between us. Few years later, found out that his dad passed away, followed by his mum and the year after that, he got married. Tried to call him but kept getting voice mails. Thought perhaps he has changed his number. Later through chatting with the rest of the colleagues, I found out that some of them have meet him by accident a few times but each time, he will pretend that he does not know them. I have not had the chance to “bump” into him so far, so I wouldn’t know.

But just last week, a colleague and I were going for lunch at the McD near our office. Being quite the unobservant me, I didn’t notice anything until my colleague quickly pulled me aside and asked “Hey, isn’t that C? He saw me looking at him but he didn’t acknowledge me or say hello!”. So, I looked and saw the back of C going up the escalator. No.. No.. in fact, he was rushing up the escalator, taking it 2 steps at a time, almost shoving aside the people already standing on the escalator.



Mmm…what do you make of that? I am not sure but don’t you think it is strange? Would like to receive comments on this as this is really a mystery to us…. Haha.

Why Men Love Bitches?

Many moons ago when I was still blogging under my friendster account, I remember signing off as a BITCH…”Babe in Total Control of Herself”. I forgot all about it until I saw this very interesting book at Borders last week. The book title read “Why Men Love Bitches – from Doormat to Dreamgirl”. I found that the author of the book Sherry Argov has very interesting opinions on this. Of cause I don’t agree with everything she wrote in her book but there were much that made a lot of sense.



I reckon being a bitch does not equate one to being rude or manipulative or catty. It is rather about standing up for what you believe in and also holding up your own. This is especially in a relationship. Yeah.. being one half of a whole does not really mean that you have to lose your identity. I’ve got girl pals who seemed to have lost their abilities to make decisions without consulting their hubbys or boyfriends for everything. Oh please.. don’t you know that it may be cute at the start but after a while, it becomes heck of an irritating thing to endure. Don’t be a lallang (akin to a willow). Stand up for your right to have an opinion.

I believe that a woman should be strong, self-assured, fiercely independent, feisty, no-nonsense especially when dealing with men. That is precisely what Argov is advocating in her book that this is the type of woman that can hook a guy, keep him on his toes while being wrapped around her finger, leaving all the nice pansies in the dust.

The celebrated French beauty Juliette Recamier once said “No woman is all sweetness”. Actually let’s be honest. Nice girls tend to be taken for granted. There were so many cases sited in the book that I could really place real people that I know in it. So, what attracts and appeals to a man? A feisty attitude is rather attractive to a man as men are born to be highly competitive and also “They love the thrill of the chase,” says Sherry Argov. “The cat and mouse chase that women find maddening is very exciting to men.” Argov explains that more often than not, this is the scenario: “For a woman, the objective is often a committed relationship. For men, the road trip to the destination is often the most fun.”



Men love challenges. If they have to go out of their way to see you, it’s an accomplishment. If you are “served to them on a platter”, the entire thrill is taken away from them. “The Bitch understands that when a man wants something, he’ll go after it, and going after it makes him want it even more,” Argov says. “A bitch seems more attractive to men because she’s a little more aloof, is more focused on herself, and hence has little interest in taking away his freedom. The Bitch is self-centered in a way: She chooses to develop and nurture herself first, before any one else—and focuses on herself, rather than on a guy”.

So girls… time to grow up and be a BITCH.



Btw.. her other book is entitled “Why Men Marry Bitches” :)